19-Year-Old Wife Convicted After Pushing Husband Out High-Rise Window

The tragic case of Joshua Hilberling highlights a devastating instance of domestic violence that ended in fatality drawing national attention due to its shocking circumstances and the reversal of typical gender roles in such incidents. On June 7 2011 23-year-old Joshua Josh Hilberling a U.S. Air Force veteran described as a tall physically imposing man (around 6-foot-5 and 220 pounds) plummeted to his death from the 25th floor of the University Club Tower a high-rise apartment building in downtown Tulsa, Oklahoma. He fell 17 stories landing on the roof of the building's parking garage where he succumbed to his injuries despite emergency response efforts.Josh's wife Amber Michelle Hilberling, who was just 19 years old at the time and seven months pregnant with their child was the only other person present during the incident. The couple had married the previous year in 2010 after a whirlwind romance but their relationship quickly deteriorated into volatility marked by arguments and physical altercations. Amber claimed the death was accidental and occurred in self-defense during a heated fight. According to her account, Josh had grabbed her shoulder or otherwise threatened her safety and that of their unborn baby prompting her to push him away. She insisted the window shatter and his fall were unintended consequences of the struggle.

Prosecutors, however, painted a different picture. They argued that Amber intentionally shoved Josh through the window in a moment of rage, supported by evidence including her own recorded statements where she reportedly admitted to pushing him and said things like "I killed him." A prior incident added weight to the prosecution's case: just a month earlier, in May 2011, Josh had sought and obtained an **emergency protective order** against Amber. He alleged that she had struck him violently on the head with a lamp during an argument, inflicting a severe wound that required **21 stitches** to close. This history suggested a pattern of aggression from Amber toward Josh, framing the fatal push not as self-defense but as an escalation of ongoing domestic abuse.

The trial garnered significant media coverage, in part because it challenged common narratives around domestic violence victims and perpetrators. Josh was portrayed by some outlets as a rare male victim in a high-profile spousal homicide case. After a trial in 2013, a jury convicted Amber of **second-degree murder** (the initial charge of first-degree murder was not upheld). On April 23, 2013, she was sentenced to **25 years in prison**, with credit for time already served in county jail (about 15 months). The judge also ordered her to pay for Josh's funeral expenses and imposed a $10,000 fine. Her conviction was later upheld on appeal in 2014.

Amber maintained her innocence throughout her incarceration, insisting in interviews (including one with Dr. Phil in 2015) that she had only pushed Josh off her to protect herself and their child, and that the window breaking was never part of her intent. She gave birth to their son while in custody following the incident.

Tragically, the story did not end with her sentencing. On October 24, 2016, Amber Hilberling—then 25 years old—was found dead in her cell at the Mabel Bassett Correctional Center in McLoud, Oklahoma. She was discovered hanging from a bunk bed, with the cord of a curling iron around her neck. The Oklahoma Department of Corrections and the state medical examiner ruled her death a **suicide** by hanging/asphyxiation. However, her family expressed doubts about this determination, citing her ongoing hope for appeals, her recent communications expressing a desire to share her side of the story, and a letter she mailed to a local news station just before her death requesting an interview. Some family members suggested prison conditions, including alleged inadequate supervision or other issues, may have contributed, leading to a later lawsuit against the Department of Corrections (filed by her mother on behalf of her estate) claiming failures in oversight and protection.This case remains a somber reminder of the complexities of domestic violence, where abuse can affect anyone regardless of gender or physical size, and how quickly toxic relationships can spiral into irreversible tragedy. Josh Hilberling's life was cut short in a moment of violence, leaving behind a young son who grew up without either parent. Amber's own end behind bars added another layer of heartbreak to an already devastating chain of events. The incident continues to spark discussions about recognizing male victims of intimate partner violence, the dynamics of self-defense claims, and the long-term impacts on families caught in such cycles.