Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for being here today.
For those that don’t know me, I’ve been best friends with the groom since middle school.
He was always a ladies man. Always had someone new on his arm for parties and dances.
Which is why it always stuck out to me that the night I met REDACTED at our house’s party, I distinctly remember both the bride and the groom showing up with someone else.
But trust me, they didn’t go home with who they came with, I know because I was the groom’s roommate.
Even after that night, they didn’t start dating and that continued; coming with someone else, going home with each other, always drawn together like gravity. And that’s how I know they’re built to last!
So let’s give a toast to the happy couple and the countless happy years ahead. May they live happily ever after!
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Narrator Voice: they did not live happily ever after. Don't even think it made three years.
Based on a true story. Some liberties taken to protect the innocent.
For Lana's Challenge:
If you've enjoyed this, please leave a like and an insight below. If you really enjoyed this, tips to fuel my coffee addiction are always appreciated. All formatting is designed for desktops. Want to read more? Below are the best of the very best of my works:
About the Creator
Matthew J. Fromm
Full-time nerd, history enthusiast, and proprietor of arcane knowledge.
Here there be dragons, knights, castles, and quests (plus the occasional dose of absurdity).
I can be reached at [email protected]
Keep reading
More stories from Matthew J. Fromm and writers in Fiction and other communities.
Throne of the Beast
“Lock and load.” Knight One’s command echoed through his helmet, drowning out the helo’s thumping engines. Knight Two sat across from him, his mechanical gloves thumbing the safety on his oversized auto shotgun clad in etched black metal. Knight Four scoffed silently, his face obscured by the jet-black helmet. An uncivilized weapon for an uncivilized man. There are already enough of those in this godless world. Two always seemed unsettling, like a big frothing dog in a constant internal struggle of, “Should I bite or hump my master?” It was no wonder Callsign General loved Two, even if Callsign Archbishop barely tolerated him. One was the Archbishop's girl.
By Matthew J. FrommExclusive • 2 years ago
Becca
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By Sara Wilsona day ago in Fiction
Humans Disrespect the Creator
May was a devoted mother, a community advocate, and someone who held her faith close to her heart. One crisp autumn evening, May was participating in another weekly church meeting with some of her friends and other members. Her friends were Elena, a feminist activist, Marcus, a retired teacher, and young Lila, a college student questioning the world around her.
By Jyoti DiClementeabout 20 hours ago in Fiction
Two Grumpy Old Men Solve the Problem
Marty and Steve were two grumpy old men who lived together. They had known each other for years. Marty had been a bachelor all his life. Steve said it was because no one could stand to ever live with. Marty’s standard reply was “Well, you are, so what sort of a moron does that make you!”
By Calvin London3 days ago in Humor
Comments (5)
Haha, no wonder that marriage didn’t last! Awesome toast, Matthew!
Damn! That would be uncomfortable to the point of having to interrupt them with something unrelated or telling the DJ to crank it, haha. Good one.
Ooof That’s a brutal toast lol
Yikes!
This is right up my alley. Deliciously wicked!